Curiosity

INTEGRATE WELL VALUES

As I was in brand development, my incredible coach, Lucca, asked me the question, “What does the world need right now?” And my automatic response was, “validation and curiosity.”

We have become so judgmental as a society, so rooted in what WE believe as truth that we have lost our sense of curiosity, understanding, acceptance of other’s beliefs and experiences. We are more divided than ever and I believe it stems from a lack of curiosity.

I went to Panama in March 2022 on an “adventure retreat” and what I found I valued the most of the experience wasn’t that I learned to surf or that I jumped off waterfalls and cliffs into huge tide pools (though that was pretty sick, see pic below). It was the feeling that everyone there was genuinely curious about one another, about their life experiences, about what they were working through spiritually and mentally, about what they were writing about in their journal. As we shared meals, no one had their phones out. They were deep in meaningful conversation and in learning about one another. As far as I could see, no one was discussing politics other divisive issues. They were learning about one another’s stories and life experiences. It was a truly beautiful thing!

The antidote to judgement is curiosity.

When we find ourselves slipping into judgment of others, we can chose curiosity as a way to stay open and in our own power.

At this same Panamanian retreat, I sat at the table with another guest who made a comment like, “I really didn’t want to come to this retreat because I didn’t want people to think I was gay.” (He is an older man from Texas who attended with his beautiful wife) Now, I could have been completely judgmental about him and this comment. I could have said to myself, “he’s so conservative. He’s a boomer. He’s judgmental himself!” and shut him out and walked away. But instead, I remained curious and thought to myself, “I wonder what this man has experienced in his life that lead him to this thought.”

A few days later he shared, “You know, in the past two days I’ve just learned how wonderful these yogis are and how open and accepting and cool they really are.” He came in with a preconceived judgment about a generalized group of people, but spent time learning about them individually and as a group and his perspective completely changed. I got to witness this person's heart open over the course of the week and we ended up sitting next to each other on a 6 hour bus ride at the end of the retreat. I learned more about him and his life and his experience and it made his week-long evolution and perspective shift all the more rewarding.

My family and I ended up staying with him and his wife as we drove cross country and it was the most wonderful visit - a true highlight of our journey. And to think, if I’d cast this person aside after his initial comment, I never would have gained such an incredible connection and friend.

It’s like the Powerline lyrics say from the top 5 Disney movies of all time, The Goofy Movie, says: “If we listen to each other's heart, We'll find we're never too far apart, and maybe love is the reason why for the first time ever we're seeing it eye to eye.” (Also, that soundtrack had no right to slap that hard! Please enjoy:)